Same Old Lang Syne
by luvcali76
Summary: A slightly fluffy, holiday oneshot, cowritten with tanith75. JH, of course.


**Same Old Lang Syne**

A/N: This story was actually co-written by tanith75 as well. The emails are down so we couldn't create a new penname. It's based solely on an old Christmas song by Dan Fogelberg called "Same Old Lang Syne." A few nights before Christmas, we were talking and somehow this song came up and we both agreed that it would probably make for an interesting JH one-shot. So, we hope you agree. Please, please, don't forget to review. This is our first attempt at a story together so your thoughts are really important to us, but please be gentle. And PLEASE listen to the song; it makes the story that much better. It can be found on Youtube if you search for "Same Old Lang Syne." Thanks!

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Point Place, Wisconsin

Christmas Eve - 1991

For twenty minutes, Steven Hyde strolled aimlessly down the aisles of Krogers grocery store, throwing random items into his basket and testing out the various types of cookies that called out to him. It was a pretty good night for shopping, he decided as he continued to wander. The air around him was quiet and there were no other shoppers crashing into him with carts full of diapers and orange juice. Only the sound of elevator music playing above his head remained to irritate him. The place was so empty, in fact, that the only other person he had seen since entering was a geeky, young stock boy who was unfortunate, or maybe just lonely, enough to work on Christmas Eve.

In here, time seemed to be suspended, pausing temporarily for the holiday, but beyond those front doors, the rest of the world celebrated with family and friends, leaving the streets and grocery stores to loners like him and the stock boy for the night.

"What's up, man?" Hyde offered to his silent friend.

The kid nodded lamely in response.

A moment later, Hyde reached the end of aisle nine and stopped. What the hell else did he need? Oh, yeah, TV dinners, the single man's surrogate wife.

'Destination: Frozen Foods Aisle' led him rightwards but when he reached the end of that aisle, he noticed another cookie display. The good kind, too.

Tossing a box into his basket, Hyde couldn't help but notice that down the freezer row stood another customer. A chick. His eyebrow arched in intrigue. She was cute. His type, too.

He stared at her for a moment as she searched through the cold, frosted glass of one of the large freezers. Her petite little body appealed to him and so did her long, dark hair. She reminded him of somebody and he knew exactly who. From his position, he could only see the girl's profile, but it was obvious that the two had very similar features: that tiny little nose, those pouty lips, the way her eyebrows furrowed when she was deep in thought.

And then she turned.

A painful shot of adrenaline surged through his body, causing his breath to stop altogether as his stare turned into an outright gape.

It was her.

God damn it, she was amazing. Still. Even better than he remembered.

She looked up and seemed to notice him, making him step thoughtfully to the right and out of sight. He had to think. Should he say something? Should he go over there? God, would she even remember him? They hadn't spoken to each other in almost ten years so it was very possible that she wouldn't.

Peering around the corner again, Hyde saw that she hadn't moved much. She was reaching inside the freezer now, stretched up on her tip-toes and looking like an angel.

Only one thing to do, he concluded as his eyes traced along her delicate curves.

Taking several shallow breaths, Hyde called upon the gods of aloofness and casually turned the corner. He had a plan. A brilliant one. One no one had ever thought of before.

He would accidentally bump into her…her tiny little body in this huge, empty store.

It was genius.

"Oh! Excuse me," he said, bumping into her and grabbing the sleeve of her coat to steady her small form.

Still holding on, he locked eyes with hers. One blue. One green. "No, _I'm_ sorry," she replied softly.

God, it _was_ her. He stared for a moment as her eyebrows furrowed in that way, waiting…waiting…until…

Her bright eyes widened. "Steven?"

"Jackie?"

Then there it was…that smile. "Steven!" It made him smile, too, and so Jackie moved quickly to hug him, clumsily dropping her purse in the process. "Oh God!" All of her belongings fell out and slid across the aisle.

"Oh, crap. I'm sorry."

"No. No. It was my fault." Jackie bent down quickly and began to gather her things as Hyde scanned the contents of his ex-girlfriend's designer bag. It was probably the only glimpse of her current life he would get.

There was make-up, of course, not that she needed it. Looking at her, he was literally speechless at how beautiful she still was. Hell, she looked even better than he remembered, which was saying a lot, because she always looked amazing when he remembered her, and he remembered her almost every day.

Looking up, Jackie caught him gawking and a blush washed over her face. His former cocky attitude suddenly resurfaced and Hyde smiled to himself, enjoying the knowledge that he still had an affect on her.

Consciously pulling his eyes away from her, he squatted down and began helping her collect the scattered belongings. It wasn't what she had in her purse that quickly piqued his interest. It was what she didn't have - no pictures of a man, no pictures of kids, nothing.

"Damn, Jackie, you always carried so much crap in your purse."

"That's because I had a big strong boyfriend to carry it for me," she purred flirtatiously, secretly grateful for the ice breaker.

Immediately, he rolled his eyes, but he couldn't stop a smirk from creeping across his face. "Please. I _never _carried your purse."

As she shoved the last of her items into the leather bag, she smiled at him. "Oh, you SO did. You did it _all_ the time," she teased and poked him in the ribs, causing a stab of heat to radiate through the spot where she had touched him.

_Crap._ All these years and one touch sent him back to 1979.

"So, how are you, Steven?" she asked as they both stood up.

"I'm good. You?"

"Oh, I'm great."

Why didn't he believe her?

Jabbing at his stomach once more, Jackie's bright smile returned. "I remember a time, now. That day I took you to the mall to pick out my dress for Senior Prom…you sat like a good boyfriend, eating a Sugar Daddy and holding my purse."

"Oh, yeah." He grinned at the memory of the day. "Although the part of that day _I_ choose to remember is the part where we fooled around in the dressing room."

Jackie gasped in mock horror and covered her mouth with her small hand. "And that salesgirl caught us!"

"Yeah. That was good stuff." Hyde said as his wicked grin turned to laughter.

Again, she poked him, playfully. "Steven! To this day, I can't go back in that store!"

"Well you shouldn't have looked so freakin' hot in that dress."

She tried to feign anger, but instead her pent-up laugh turned into a tiny snort, causing Hyde to laugh so loudly that the lone stock boy, now in the frozen foods aisle, began to stare.

"Did you just snort?" he asked with that irresistible grin he knew she loved.

"_No_."

"Yeah, you did. You snorted."

Looking around nervously, as if they were in the crowded halls of Point Place High instead of an empty grocery store, Jackie flapped her hands and shushed him, trying to get him to stop. But it only seemed to fuel his laughter.

"Oh come on, Jackie, that was better than the time Fez shot corn out his nose."

He knew she was trying to look angry, but the image of their freaky foreign friend with corn shooting out of his nose, projectile style, finally got the better of her and she started to laugh like a lunatic. Like someone who hadn't laughed in a very long time.

"God, it flew, like, halfway across the Hub," she managed to get out in between laughs.

Soon, they both had tears welling up in their eyes, and suddenly it was as if no time had passed and the horrible things that had happened between them were washed away. She laid her head down on his chest, trying to slow her laughter down.

Hyde was acutely aware of Jackie touching him, and it seemed to quell his laughter and bring him back to the present. Her hair was grazing his chin and the smell of strawberries wafted up to his nose. She still used the same damn shampoo. The same shampoo he had once bought a bottle of when he was high as a kite, just to pretend for a minute she was with him.

Without even thinking, Hyde raised an arm to wrap it around her, and then dropped it just as quickly, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable. Never in any of the times he had imagined this meeting was _this_ the scenario he came up with. Her laughter dying down, Jackie turned her face to the side and laid her head flush against Hyde's chest. The urge to grab onto her was almost unbearable, especially once he could feel one of her hands come to rest on his stomach.

Instantly, he pulled away and watched her look at him with shocked eyes, appearing horribly embarrassed and sad. And just like that, they were back in the present. Back to two people who had hurt each other deeply.

As Hyde stared at the woman he had both loved and hurt more than any other woman in his life, he had absolutely no idea what to say. So he fell back to his old standby and said nothing.

Instead, he bent down and picked up his basket, then hers, and headed towards the checkout stand. He couldn't stand to look at her embarrassed face; it made him feel like the ass he had been to her so long ago.

He could hear her following behind him, and just the sound of her footsteps made him ache inside. He wanted to turn around and look at her, to tell her it was alright, but he just kept walking.

Quickly finding the only open lane, Hyde set both baskets down and pulled out their groceries, sensing immediately the moment Jackie slipped up behind him and stopped. She was so close that he could practically feel her gentle breaths.

Finally, he turned to face her.

She had that same hopeful look in her eyes that he had seen so many times before and he knew she was waiting for him to say something. The teenager he had once been was telling him to shut the hell up, but the man he had grown to be wanted to say something, anything.

"You still like ice cream, huh?"

Feeling more Forman-like than Forman, Hyde mentally kicked the crap out of himself. It was probably better if he stayed silent.

Seeming to sense his discomfort, Jackie just nodded and smirked affectionately.

Her silence left Hyde's mind reeling as he tried to come up with something else to say. But now, all he could think of was the night he had turned Jackie into his own personal sundae. God, what a night.

With a sudden sense of urgency, he cleared his throat and tried to expel the lascivious image from his mind.

Glancing back at Jackie, he saw that her eyes were glued on the baskets in front of her. He stared a second too long, and again, he was caught. Except, this time, instead of looking away, he held her gaze. And it was worth it, he quickly decided, as her eyes widened and the corners of her mouth turned up into a smile. Definitely worth it.

"Paper or plastic?"

Feeling as if he had been woken from a dream, Hyde turned to the cashier, suddenly faced with that old urge to kick the crap out of the pimply-faced kid.

"Who cares?!" Hyde sneered.

"Paper," Jackie answered for him.

Crossing his arms in front of his chest, Hyde turned to Jackie and watched as she raised a brow - waiting for him to disagree. But instead, he just shook his head and silently chuckled. She always did like speaking for him.

The elevator music droned on overhead, taunting their uncomfortable silence. Keeping quiet was torture for Jackie and Hyde knew that it was only a matter of time before she broke. "I talked to Michael a couple of months ago."

Hyde nodded, suddenly grateful that she loved to talk. "Oh yeah? How's he doing?"

"Good, I mean, he loves Chicago. Brooke's good, the kids are good."

He gave a small grin, wishing he had kept in better touch with his goofy friend.

"I sent Betsy, like, a million outfits for Christmas," she added.

Again, all Hyde could do was nod. He had mostly neglected him and Jackie's goddaughter, and he knew Jackie knew it. It was one of many regrets Hyde had piled up over the years. He told himself that it was because he didn't do well around kids, but considering Betsy was now almost thirteen, that excuse seemed completely lame.

"Seventeen eighty-eight."

Hyde had forgotten about the food and the bored looking kid that now stared at him with an outstretched hand. Jackie instantly went into her purse, but he was quicker.

"I got it, Jackie."

He couldn't help but notice the small smile on her face as he reached into his wallet and pulled out some cash. And as they stood watching their pathetic excuse for dinner get bagged, Hyde's mind wandered back to a past when Christmas had meant delicious food and private cheers from his own personal cheerleading squad.

"Merry Christmas," the cashier stated flatly. And it was then that Hyde realized that to this kid, he and Jackie were probably just another couple, grabbing some last minute snacks before they headed off to their evening's gathering. And for a split second, he let himself pretend the kid was right. It was better than the reality and with a sudden sense of regret, he realized that if he had been a different person years ago, he wouldn't have had to pretend.

Hating where his mind was starting to wander and suddenly craving a beer, Hyde quickly grabbed their bags and headed towards the door with Jackie following close behind. A stab of anxiety pierced through Hyde's chest as the automatic doors opened and released them both out into the snowy Wisconsin night.

The flakes were falling fast and it didn't take long for them to collect in Jackie's raven hair, but to his surprise, she made no attempt to brush them away.

"Steven ..."

"Jackie ..."

They both laughed, and then paused, waiting for the other to continue. As they did, Hyde watched several flecks of snow settle on her lips and suddenly his need for that beer became overwhelming. "You wanna get a beer?"

"Absolutely."

Since she had never answered that enthusiastically to the idea of beer before, Hyde figured that she was either incredibly thirsty or just as uncomfortable as he was. Both possibilities strangely comforted him as they took a few tentative steps forward. Then he watched Jackie look up and down the street and it occurred to Hyde that she no longer knew where the bars were in Point Place. So, without saying a word, he grabbed her by the crook of the elbow and started to lead them towards his car.

"This isn't some big conspiracy to get me in your car and make out with me, is it?"

The opportunity he had been waiting for finally appeared before him and he wasn't going to let it slip by. When he leaned in close to her, he swore he could hear her breath hitch. "Jackie, if I wanted to make out with you, I'd do it right here in the street."

As he stepped back and started to pull her along again, he watched out of the corner of his eye as she swallowed, twice. Apparently, she had forgotten all those Zen lessons.

They reached the parking lot and Hyde glanced back and forth between his car and what was clearly hers. A shining red Mustang. Turning to glance at her, he could tell by the expression on her face she knew she had been busted.

"A Mustang, huh?"

It was as if they had been plopped back into the circle on New Year's Eve, 1979, and Kelso was comparing Hyde to a Mustang.

"Umm ..."she shuffled her foot in the snow, "I always wanted a Mustang."

Without another word, Jackie unlocked the passenger side door and gestured for him to get in.

"Oh no," he grinned at her, "**I** wanna drive this thing."

With a shrug, Jackie stepped inside and Hyde shut the door behind her. For a reason that he couldn't quite understand, the fact that she drove a Mustang made him feel good. But he had a feeling driving with her in it would make him feel even better.

As they drove along in silence, Hyde thanked the beer gods of Wisconsin that there was a bar on nearly every corner of his small town. They reached Bully's Pub in less then a minute and Hyde pulled the car up alongside the curb. Climbing out the driver's side, he headed over to Jackie, and opened her door. Again, without thinking, he grabbed her arm to help her out and they trudged their way through the snow towards the door.

"God, Steven, did you have to bring me to such a dump?"

Ignoring her question, he let go of her, momentarily, and reached for the door. Locked. _Shit._ He felt like one of Pavlov's dogs, salivating for a cold Bud. Now he was faced with the uncomfortable decision of whether or not to grab onto Jackie's arm again. What kind of moron wore high heels in the snow anyway, he wondered as he took her hand. Hyde glanced down at her unstable feet as they walked and found his answer… Jackie, that's who.

"You remember Al's?" he asked when they were back in the car.

"Yeah," she nodded, turning her head to glance at him.

"They're always open." At least, that's what he was telling himself, because Jackie kept crossing and uncrossing her legs and if he didn't get a beer soon he was pretty sure he was going to drive her shiny new car off the road.

Once more, they went through the routine of parking and exiting the car and again, he returned his hand to her elbow, this time threading his arm a little further through hers. Al's was quickly approaching but instead of feeling relief, Hyde felt irritation at what was clearly a "closed" sign hanging on the door of the bar.

"Shit."

"Steven, you are, like, the worst tour guide, _ever_."

"Jackie, it's freakin' Christmas Eve. Most people are drinking at home."

As he watched her roll her eyes, he suddenly felt like he was experiencing one of those déjà vu thingys.

"You know, Jackie, if I had a dollar for every time you rolled her eyes at me, I could've bought my own bar."

"At least then we wouldn't be wandering the streets like hobos," she snapped back.

"Look," Hyde began, "let's just find a liquor store. There's more of those in this town than gas stations."

"Fine," Jackie sighed.

Hyde wasn't sure what irritated him more - the fact that he couldn't get a god damn beer or the fact that he and Jackie had fallen back into their former patterns faster than the snow was falling. It was like God had taken a giant eraser, wiped out the last twelve years and stuck them back where they had left off.

Heading back to the Mustang, Hyde felt like a nomad wandering the desert in search of nourishment and without even realizing it, he quickened his pace, causing Jackie to slip. Feeling her fall, Hyde instinctively grabbed her around the waist with both arms. She immediately glanced up at him with an adoring smile, that smile that seemed to be reserved especially for him.

It felt way too good to hold onto her tiny waist, and Hyde was suddenly uncomfortable with being the object of her 'hero worship.'

"Jackie, do you own a pair of shoes that don't have some giant heel on them?" he asked, trying to add more irritation into his voice than he really felt.

"Steven, I am a tiny woman who likes big heels. Get over it."

The liquor store was a five minute drive, which almost certainly meant they'd have to speak to each other. He wondered why she hadn't yet asked why he was alone on Christmas Eve. Even more, he wondered why _she_ was. But he was never one to pass up a quiet Jackie, so he kept his questions to himself.

They spent most of the drive in silence, making it the most nerve wracking four minutes of his life. So much so that Hyde eventually found himself praying that she would just speak again, a plea he would have never predicted, but just as the tension peaked, Jackie turned her body to face him and relieved the pressure.

"Why were you at the grocery store by yourself on Christmas Eve?"

There was a brief silence as he considered his reply, but then something occurred to him. "You know, in case you forgot, you were there, too."

Casually, she looked away. "Yeah. I guess I was."

"Why?" Now stopped at a red light, Hyde was able to take his eyes off the road and look at his lonely Christmas companion more closely. Her eyes were aimed at the sky, peering out her window at nothing, maybe at the snow, he thought. Whatever she was looking at, it must have been _fucking_ amazing because they both wore the same expression.

"I miss the snow," she remarked softly.

"You didn't answer me."

"You didn't answer me, either," she retorted, turning back to him.

Hyde gave a curt nod. "Fair enough."

The light turned green and the questions temporarily ceased as they pulled into the liquor store parking lot. Thankfully, it was open and in ready supply of the distraction he so desperately needed.

"So, what do you wanna get?" he asked as they stared at several freezers full of beer.

"Just a six-pack, right?"

Hyde nodded. "Yeah, a six-pack is good." Any more than that and things could get weird, he supposed. A six-pack was relaxing, tension easing, and ice-breaking. The holy trinity of awkward reunions.

"I got this one," Jackie offered, paying for the beer as Hyde gave her a small grin.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

Hyde grabbed the brown paper bag that carried their liquid courage and opened the door, allowing Jackie to step back out into the cold ahead of him.

The instant rush of arctic air was refreshing and as each of them split off around the car, Hyde thought he caught the brief flash of a demure smile before Jackie's eyes turned downwards.

Damn. He was liking this. Maybe a little _too_ much.

Once they were both seated inside her Mustang, their beer mission completed, the conversation seemed effortless. The mood felt lighter. Something about the mixture of his oldest girlfriend and his favorite beverage made him feel younger, braver and a little mischievous. "So what do you wanna do now?"

Jackie grinned. "Um…Go back to the grocery store, sit in my car and catch a buzz?"

"Sounds like a hell of a plan," Hyde replied, nodding his head as he started the car and drove off. God, now he remembered why he had liked this girl so much. She made_ great_ plans.

His favorite: naked chocolate sundae night.

Hyde doubted that one would make a comeback but hope sprang eternal on nights like this, especially when a six pack of Bud was involved. His own inner voice made him smirk while next to him, the object of his newfound affection took immediate notice as they reached their destination.

"What's so funny, Steven Hyde?" she inquired with a contented smile.

Looking at her, he grinned again and shook his head. "It's just…this isn't that bad." He threw the car in park and scooted his seat back as far as it would go.

"And you thought it would be?"

"I didn't know," he answered truthfully as he handed her a beer and watched her crack it open. She really was pretty, he thought to himself. And everything she did, every movement she made, fascinated him tonight. The way her naked, manicured ring finger circled the edge of the can while her eyes followed its pattern and the way her plump lips twitched outwardly with each pass, had him captivated. With his next breath, his own lips parted out of pure human response to the desire to kiss her. Plus, he couldn't ignore the fact that he had been in love with her once. The girl had apparently been so wonderful that she actually made him fall in love. Something he never thought himself capable of back then, but something she had done and something she was doing now, made him downright stupid.

If he had any doubts of that fact, they were squelched the moment he was caught staring for the third time. "What?"

"Nothing."

At that, Jackie gave him a fake smile and looked away, making him wonder what had her so abnormally quiet tonight. Maybe she _had_ changed.

He turned away, too, and opened his own beer while simultaneously telling himself to get a grip. She wasn't interested in him. She was just lonely. They had met at a grocery store on Christmas Eve, twelve years after breaking up. And she had given no indication that she wanted to do anything other than pass the time with an old friend. She was alone, after all, and he wondered again… Why?

Watching her as she raised her beer to her mouth, Hyde suddenly regretted that he had avoided seeing her for so long. There was no excuse for going ten years without talking to one of the most important people in his life. No good excuse anyway. The only way he could justify it was by telling himself that he hadn't wanted to put either of them through the drama he was sure would ensue. But here they sat, no drama, no screaming. Just two people together on Christmas Eve.

As if she could read his mind she turned sideways and grinned at him. "We missed you at Michael's wedding."

"Yeah," he nodded, "I couldn't leave the store." A total lie.

"Oh sure," she shrugged and gave him her best understanding smile, "I understand."

Translation - 'I know that's not true.'

"You weren't at Eric and Donna's wedding," he reminded her.

"Same thing," she bluffed, "I couldn't get away from work."

An even bigger lie than his, he was sure. The only thing that probably kept Jacqueline Burkhart from being the maid of honor at her best friend's wedding was the thought of having to walk down the aisle with him.

"So why are you back?" he decided to ask.

"To see my dad."

"Oh. So then, you're staying with him?"

"No. His wife and I don't get along." Hyde scowled at the thought, wondering where she was staying in that case. Jackie obviously noticed his expression. "No. It's ok, though, cause I mean, they only have a one bedroom apartment anyway, and I am_ not_ sleeping on their couch." She smiled weakly, attempting to project more enthusiasm, but obviously didn't have it in her. "I've got a _really_ great room at the Howard Johnson."

"So why aren't you hanging out with him right now?"

"Well, if I was with _him_, I couldn't be with _you_, now could I?"

He grinned at her blatant avoidance of the question.

"Jackie…"

"Cause, we got into an argument," she admitted sadly.

"Over what?"

She took a deep breath, and unexpectedly, her face twisted into several shades of uncertainty and embarrassment. "I told him that I'm leaving my husband."

"You're…Wait, you're married?" He watched her nod and was surprised to feel his heart sink into his stomach. Well there went that, he thought regretfully. She could have fucking said something before. He was a little pissed, at first, but then he had to remember: the interest had been one-sided all along. She probably felt no reason to reveal details about her private life. Why should she?

Over the years, he had seen Jackie talk about her relationships ending more times than he could count. With Kelso there had been tears, with Fez there had been yelling and with himself there had been both tears and yelling and also the occasional slap. But as she spoke of her failed marriage, her face remained strangely detached.

"He's um, he's an architect," she was speaking quickly now like she did when she was embarrassed. "We have a really great house and you know, all that stuff," she paused and turned to watch Hyde like she was waiting for a burn to come. When he simply stared back and waited for her to continue, she looked away. "I know you think I'm shallow and horrible for marrying someone because they had the right job and knew the right people. But he ...," she bit her lip and shot him a side ways glance, "he took care of me. He kept me safe, you know"

Of course he knew; if anyone knew he knew. Jackie had always wanted someone to just be there for her like her parents hadn't been, like Kelso hadn't been, his heart sunk - like he hadn't been.

Hyde noticed that the small brunette by his side had left out one little detail about her architect - the fact that she loved him. But if she would've told him that, he was pretty sure it would've been a lie

"So why are you leaving him?"

Her mouth turned down as if the explanation were simple. "We just…weren't meant to be."

Hyde wasn't sure what to say to that and was suddenly feeling very uncomfortable. Being a comforting shoulder to cry on was never his strong suit. But he would try his damnedest tonight. "So then your dad…"

"Can we talk about something else?"

Shutting up quickly, Hyde turned his head to look at her. "Yeah." He didn't want to talk about it either. He didn't know her husband, shit, he didn't even know she had one. Where the hell had he been, he wondered, quickly realizing that he needed to keep in better touch with his friends.

"So are _you_ married?" she asked with a new smile.

"No." Her colorful eyes were staring at him now, expecting more, an explanation, maybe. "Uh, I almost was, a few years back, but it didn't work out." He took another large swig, hoping to evade any further talk about that.

"Not meant to be?" she offered.

"Yeah…I guess not."

Slowly, he nodded and she nodded, too, and both finished their beers, going straight for a second helping. Hyde popped his can open and took a swig, having a sudden recollection. "Hey, Jackie. You remember when there was that really huge sale on generic beer," He couldn't help but laugh already, "and for my birthday you spent all your money buying me…"

"Three cases!" she blurted out happily.

Hyde smiled. "Yeah."

"I remember how drunk we all got and Michael getting his head stuck in Mrs. Forman's toaster oven," she said, taking a large gulp of her drink.

"Oh, crap. I forgot about that." His words turned to laughter and she followed closely behind with a giggle fit that made his chest hurt. It was nice to hear her laugh; it fit her better than sadness did.

"And Donna kept saying that she couldn't pee and made everyone try it to see if it was just her!"

Hyde let out a silent chuckle. "Oh yeah. Man, we were so jacked up that night." Jackie smiled, nodding as he turned to see her reaction. Really jacked up and really horny as he recalled. He had spent the latter half of that night making her scream out for God and he watched her recall the very memory and turn to him with bashful eyes.

"It was an interesting night," she forced out, swallowing down a fresh batch of anxiety.

He did the same. "Yeah. Interesting." They both looked forward and sat in silence for another minute. Well, this was dumb, he eventually thought to himself. Why were they acting like nervous teenagers over the memory of something that happened twelve years before? Over sex. Really _great_ sex.

Quickly finishing his second beer, Hyde grabbed a third and opened it as she gasped. "Oh my God! Did you hear about what happened to crazy Caroline?"

"Uh, uh," he responded. "What happened?"

"She got committed," Jackie answered with a look of near-glee. "Locked up!"

"For what… chokin' herself?"

Jackie shook her head. "No. For burning down a Piggly Wiggly." Hyde's jaw dropped and for the next forty-eight minutes, they traded stories and made each other laugh harder than either had laughed in a really long time. Their beer may have been long gone but the memories were plentiful. Tales of skinny neighbor boys, lumberjacks and perverted foreign exchange students kept the conversation flowing. Hyde's Budweiser-warmed brain gave him the courage to venture into slightly scarier territory, though: the present.

"You know, Jackie," He paused thoughtfully. "You look really good."

Dropping her head slightly, Jackie looked up at Hyde through her long eyelashes. He couldn't tell if it was her attempt at being modest or if she just didn't believe him. Despite what everyone thought, Jackie had an insecurity in her that ran deep. One that he probably hadn't helped quell, but instead nurtured with his past behaviors.

Maybe it was the beer or maybe it was the ten years they'd spent apart, but something in him suddenly felt that tonight was a good night to reassure her that she was beautiful.

"You're even better than I remember."

The unrehearsed and simple compliment had the exact desired affect and Hyde watched as a bright smile lit up every beautiful feature on Jackie's face. "I do, don't I?!"

Hyde laughed. Well, if there was any question, it was answered now. She was the same girl, the one that craved and adored compliments, and he was sincerely glad, finding himself encouraged by that fact.

And it was then that her smile fell into something else. He wasn't sure what but she seemed to be sizing him up, and he wondered: Was I too obvious? Fuck. It was apparent that he needed to reel his stupidity in before he made an even bugger fool of himself. The truth was, he wanted her, badly. He wanted her company; he wanted her comfort and God, he wanted to feel and taste every inch of flesh on her body. He wanted all three, tonight.

"You know, I saw you at the Grooves in Madison a couple years back."

"What?" Frowning, Hyde looked over. "Why didn't you say anything?"

She shrugged, appearing a little ashamed and possibly sorry that she hadn't. "I didn't know what to say. You had some girl with you and I just thought…I guess I just figured it would be awkward." Surprisingly, Hyde understood. He had seen her a few times, too, and not said a word. "But, I'm really proud of you, Steven. You're doing really well."

"Thanks."

"So come on, Steven," Jackie asked after several minutes of comfortable silence finally found them, "why were you by yourself tonight?"

He shrugged casually. "I don't know. I just felt like being alone."

"Nobody _wants_ to be alone on Christmas Eve," she told him, revealing more about her own feelings than his. He didn't say anything in response. Instead he just sat and fought back the urge to kiss her. Four beers had done little more than increase that excruciating desire. "What about the Forman's? Why aren't you with them tonight?" Jackie added.

"I saw them yesterday."

"And Eric and Donna?"

"I saw them, too. So there was no one left to see tonight."

"Well you saw _me_," she reminded him sweetly before coyly turning away and sighing. "I'm actually really glad I ran into you, Steven. Eating ice cream and watching TV alone in my hotel room wasn't exactly sounding all that great."

Shutting his eyes, Hyde had to tell himself again not to kiss her. Not to look at her pouty mouth or the way her eyes sought his comfort. Not to lets his hands and lips search out the soft skin that had been tempting him all night. "Yeah, I'm glad I ran into you, too," he finally replied.

Another few minutes of silence passed.

"Well… I guess it's getting late," she said so softly that a chill spread through the center of his already aching chest. "I don't feel like sitting in my car, anymore." She looked at him then, expectantly, and he wasn't sure what she meant by it.

"Yeah, I, uh…I guess I should go."

"Well," He watched her eyes flutter restlessly around her car and her mouth make several attempts at words, but no sound left her lips until she sighed, almost disappointedly. "Okay."

"Yeah, okay. So…then…I'm gonna go," Hyde let out painfully, really, really not wanting to. He had expected to spend Christmas Eve alone and never expected any gifts, but apparently God had different plans for this night. God had sent her to him. He had sent them each other. Probably to dilute the loneliness and make the time pass easier. Or maybe it was something else.

Hyde's eyes were set hard on hers, and hers stared back, still so expectantly.

"I'm…I'm in room 212 if you wanna call sometime…or something. If you get bored. I'm stuck here 'til after New Years."

Hyde nodded. God damn it, was she hinting at something? He hated this. Why didn't she just say it? Maybe she wasn't hinting. Maybe it was nothing, and he was imagining only what he wanted to believe. "Okay."

He waited, but she said nothing else.

So, with a small sigh, Hyde opened the car door and slowly got out while she did the same. A couple of seconds later, they met at the trunk and stopped. Maybe it was the alcohol, or the way the snow collected in her hair, but Hyde couldn't control his own arms as they pulled her in for a tight hug.

God, she was warm.

Flashes of memories, sweet and strong, revealed themselves in his mind and it suddenly became too much. The way her hair smelled and the way she felt in his arms made his body ache and immediately, he was young again. He was also suddenly very sorry that he had never given this girl a chance. Not since her had somebody offered him so much unconditional love and sacrifice. Even as shallow and narcissistic as she was, Jackie Burkhart had loved him better than any other. He knew because he never felt that wanted or needed again.

She squeezed him tightly, causing a surge of sensation to flow freely from his torso to the rest of his body. It prompted a near explosion of nostalgia, something he'd never felt before and his mortality suddenly occurred to him for the first time in his life. He was thirty-one years old and alone and still thought about a girl he'd known since he was eight. A thousand girls had come and gone, but only one had made this type of impression on him. Not that he hadn't loved after her—he had—but _she_ had placed in his heart her own brand of it, pure and clean and innocent like that from a child's heart. She was his first and in that lay the difference between her and the rest of the world.

Quicker than he would have liked, Jackie pulled away and marked him spellbound with her sleepy eyes. "Don't be a stranger," she whispered as her hands rose to cup his ears. "Okay, Steven?" He nodded, unable to peel his own eyes away from her mouth. The resulting anxiety caused his respirations to thin and his heart to pump at an over-worked pace. God, he wanted to kiss her so badly. Do anything at all to her. Especially with her warm, soft hands over his ears, scratching slowly downwards over his sideburns and his cheeks. Her gentle fingers and glossy, pink lips were all that existed anymore. Even his own tongue betrayed him, prematurely flexing in his mouth as it readied itself to invade hers.

In the next moment, he decided to just do it, just kiss her, but before he could lean the four inches forward, her lips were already pressed softly to his, feeling warm and soft, like her hands as she gave him a soft peck. And then another, until his tongue naturally found its way inside to caress hers. She allowed him to experience her slick, warm flesh for a brief moment and then kissed him softly before pulling away, stunned and winded.

Her eyes danced between his for a moment and then, without another word, she stepped around him and got into her car, driving off as he stood in the snow, speechless. Hyde watched her go and cringed as something stabbed his chest and burdened it with what felt like a thousand pound weight.

For a moment, he was back in school, feeling the pain of having her and then having her ripped away in an instant. He wondered if it were possible to feel any worse. But he knew it was. Wasted love felt worse. She knew it. He knew it. But she had no idea back then how hard he really had tried for her. In the beginning, when she was still earning his love, he had tried. And as badly as he messed things up on occasion… that was his best, at the time. She never understood that. Every time she had thrown his best friend in his face, every time she had called him cheap and cold, he was actually making an effort. God, he was a screwed up kid.

His eyebrow arched in acceptance as the snow turned to rain in the sky above him. She was gone again. Maybe they'd meet once more. Maybe not. Either way, tonight's memory would have to hold him over he decided as he headed for his car.

The leather driver's seat was cold as he finally sat down and shut his car door, a huge divergence from the warmth of the girl he had been holding only a few minutes prior. Room 212, he reminded himself as he started the ignition and pulled away. She'd told him that so he would call, right?

_I'm in room 212 if you wanna call sometime…or something._

_Or something_, Hyde repeated several times in his head, trying to decipher its cryptic meaning while he drove. Or was he digging too deeply? 'Something' could translate into many things but Jackie was a simple girl, no matter how hard she tried to convey the contrary. She was old-fashioned and in no way enigmatic.

'A woman should be a cook in the kitchen, a maid in the living room and an acrobat in the bedroom.'

Hyde smirked and closed his eyes. God, he liked her.

'Something' probably meant anything, anything at all. The girl was giving him the freedom to define her terms. She had given him freedom throughout their entire relationship if he really thought about it, the freedom to be himself, to be a screw-up and a bastard, and to be honest, even if it meant hurting her feelings and further destroying her self-esteem.

And he had been all of those things. He had been rash and impetuous with her, he was aware of that, but with age comes patience and fortitude and he had given up those hasty reactions long ago.

And that was it. That was the moment he decided to go after her.

In one sudden movement, Hyde spun his car around, nearly skidding off the road as he aimed his steering wheel for the Howard Johnson Hotel. Fuck it, he thought. If anything, at least he had tried. He always had with her, whether she wanted to believe it or not. And he wasn't going to stop now, not after that kiss. He wanted her and she seemed to want _something_ from him, or at least he hoped she did.

A few minutes later, he was at her hotel, scanning the lot for her car. And there it was, parked right in front. So he wasted no time heading inside. The elevator to the second floor placed him six rooms down from room 212 and with each step, his courage faded, forcing him to battle those old demons that told him she didn't really want him; that told him to walk away.

202…204…

_Should auld acquaintance be forgot…_

Each leg forward was agony. The voice in his head told him to get the hell out of there, that he wasn't good enough for her, that he would only hurt her and himself, especially if she rejected him. But things were different now, they weren't in love, and this wasn't 1979 and there was no Kelso. With time, those things had faded away and all that remained was them, older and hopefully wiser. Maybe they could begin again, the right way.

206…208…

_And never brought to mind…_

Hyde continued forward, reconciling the voice that had destroyed his relationship with her years before, the one that had propelled him down a westward highway, pushed him into the arms of another girl and insisted that he hurt Jackie for hurting him. Because that was the thing; that voice would always be within him. It had carried him through being abandoned as a child, but he was a grown man now and it didn't have the power it used to.

210…

_Should auld acquaintance be forgot…_

212

Hyde stared at her door and told himself that he had nothing to lose and everything to gain. Raising his fist, he decided to put his faith in the trusting girl that sat inside. That was the one thing that he had never tried before. But tonight, he would, if she would let him.

He finally knocked, and a moment later, the beautiful brunette he had come to see greeted him with a relieved smile.

_For Auld Lang Syne…_

"God, I was hoping you would come…"

_Christmas Eve, 1978…_

"_You didn't think I would?" Hyde asked, adjusting his bolo as he stood on Donna's front porch, frowning and silently letting her know that he wasn't thrilled about the evening to come._

"_Well, I wasn't sure," she replied, stepping outside with him._

"_I told you I would."_

_At that, Jackie smiled lovingly. "I know, and you're a good boyfriend. Here, hold my purse." With a sigh, Hyde did as he was asked while Jackie adjusted her striped skirt. And once she was finished, she wiggled flirtatiously and hooked her arm in his as they continued to walk toward his el Camino. "Steven, I love you, and do you know why?"_

"_Cause I'm the best looking guy in Wisconsin?"_

"_Well…that. But also because when I needed you, you took my hint and were there for me."_

"_Jackie, you don't hint. You bug, pry, kick, nag and yell. And yesterday, you used that freakin' pouting thing."_

"_Yeah, that's me hinting, Steven." _

_Hyde rolled his eyes. "Well, next time, try actually hinting and you'll see that I'll still be there, ok?"_

"_Oh, Steven. You're so sweet," she purred in his ear._

"_No, I'm not. I'm just trying to stay on your good side. Cause in case you forgot, it's naked chocolate sundae night."_

_A wicked smile washed over her beautiful, young face as she arched a solitary brow. "Well, how about naked, grateful cheerleader night instead?" _

"_I'm a flexible man, Jackie," he told her with that grin she loved. _

"_Yeah, I'll bet," she replied, winking as he let her in his car and shut the door. She remembered thinking that she loved her life because he was in it. And how she just knew that, no matter what happened, he always would be. Because there was one thing about Jackie Burkhart and Steven Hyde: they understood each other. And, although he had his faults, he usually heard her pleas for him, even when he didn't realize it. _

_He was a good boyfriend. _

_He tried. _

_And deep down inside, she knew it._

_The End._

**Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year Everyone!**

* * *

**A/N2:** Please, please review. You'll make two little fanfic authors extremely happy during the holidays. 

Same Old Lang Syne – Dan Fogelberg

Met my old lover in the grocery store  
The snow was falling Christmas Eve  
I stole behind her in the frozen foods  
And I touched her on the sleeve

She didn't recognize the face at first  
But then her eyes flew open wide  
She went to hug me and she spilled her purse  
And we laughed until we cried

We took her groceries to the checkout stand  
The food was totaled up and bagged  
We stood there lost in our embarrassment  
As the conversation dragged

We went to have ourselves a drink or two  
But couldn't find an open bar  
We bought a six pack at the liquor store  
And we drank it in her car

We drank a toast to innocence  
We drank a toast to now  
We tried to reach beyond the emptiness  
But neither one knew how

She said she'd married her an architect  
Who kept her warm and safe and dry  
She would've liked to said she loved the man  
But she didn't like to lie

I said the years had been a friend to her  
And that her eyes were still as blue  
But in those eyes I wasn't sure if I  
Saw doubt or gratitude

She said she saw me in the record store  
And that I must be doing well  
I said the audience was heavenly  
But the traveling was hell

We drank a toast to innocence  
We drank a toast to now  
We tried to reach beyond the emptiness  
But neither one knew how

We drank a toast to innocence  
We drank a toast to time  
We're living in our eloquence  
Another auld lang syne

The beer was empty and our tongues were tired  
And running out of things to say  
She gave a kiss to me as I got out  
And I watched her drive away

Just for a moment I was back at school  
And felt that old familiar pain  
And as I turned to make my way back home  
The snow turned into rain


End file.
